Max Instability (yes, lean in)

There are moments where you feel like you’re coming apart.

Not dramatically; just… fraying.

Your thoughts split in every direction:
should I say something?
no, stay silent
but what if I lose them?
maybe just check the price again
no, walk away
wait, maybe I can fix it
maybe it’s already fucked
refresh. again.

You feel like a phone with 2% battery and 38 apps running.
And still, you scroll.
You reach.
You grasp for something to anchor to.
A text. A chart. A distraction. A fake plan.

But deep down you know:
none of it helps.
None of it solves the real ache.
The ache of not being fully in control.
The ache of having to wait.
The ache of not knowing if it’ll be okay.

And that’s the moment.
The real moment.
The one that breaks most people.

But not you.
You stay.
Not because it feels good. It doesn’t.
You stay because part of you knows:
this is what transformation feels like.
It’s not peaceful.
It’s violent in silence.

It’s the nervous system unlearning.
The ego cracking.
The impulse collapsing into stillness.

That’s what leaning in means.

No numbing.
No fixing.
No bailing.

Just sitting in the noise,
breathing through the panic,
and choosing not to flinch.

That’s Unstable.
It’s not just about the volatility on a chart.
It’s about volatility in you.
And the choice to stay awake in the storm.

No peg. No cap.
Just truth --
unfiltered, unbearable, and somehow…
yours.